Friday, December 14, 2007

ये Bowl season







Well its that time of year.....Bowl season....lets see if the SEC is really gonna do it all.....
Tebow won the Heisman....wont be his last.....he was almost non existent since his mom got dysentery when she was in the Phillipines on a missionary trip...took some drugs, and they told her that Timmy would have severe damage from the drugs and that she should consider other options.....thank God for Fla fans, she didnt do anything and the only side effect is that she created some sort of Superhuman Football Mutant....I cant prove it, but he seems to have some sort of Donnie Darko space-time disruption thing going on....If there was a Tim Tebow life story, would Chuck Norris be worthy to play the part?



I hope this year will settle the argument that the SEC is the best conference when all the dust settles.....What I hate the most is damn ESPN's bullshit bowl playoff....they screwed LSU out of the championship to further their love for all things USC...and actually had the balls to put Oklahoma in the BCS game with USC....Shenanigans I tell you!!! Didnt they already play that game that Auburn was supposed to play in 2004? I think Auburn would have still lost to that USC team.... but not as bad as Okla. did....it was pathetic... I think tOSU is the new Okla. when it comes to going to the BCS championship, then getting beat twice....Pretty successful in getting there, just cant put it all together...



Now Rich Rod is in the mix for the Michigan job...Funny, I think I've seen this song and dance before...looks like UM is just trying to look busy....Jesco White wont let RR leave WV...
What will be interesting is the Auburn-Arkansas game.....next year....Petrino, who tried to oust Tubbs at Auburn, the job Petrino REALLY wanted....vs Tubbs, the man who survived Jet-Gate and will probaly exact his revenge in a bad way vs Petrino....it WILL get ugly since this is personal.....plus this new hire of Tony Franklin is a big F/U to upper admin for trying to screw him over for Petrino..should be interesting to see how well Auburn can get up to speed...
Back to the AU-Arkansas game, Petrino will be outgunned since all his weapons will go pro...
I will say this....I feel 90% confident that everyday that goes by that Les Miles will be at Michigan once he beats tOSU......and gets his check....looks to me he has had it all along and people just want to push it and push it cause they feel they need an explanation...
He has talk to them and you have to be completely insane to believe he was "giving advice" on candidates.....That would be like your girlfriend you've been dating and you know she holds a candle for an old ex-husband or ex-boyfriend, and you want to marry her and she is getting cold feet..sketchy at best since she knows you want a long term commitment..and you know shes been acting weird....you actually believe if she tells you that she is on the phone and is giving him advice on who to marry and what type of girl he should go for? Really? I call bullshit....
If for some weird reason he doesnt go, you can bet your ass Lloyd Carr fucked this up for damn sure.....Note to Carr....Let Miles come home....he will show you how to beat tOSU....
LSU over tSOU 35-21....then 20 mins later, with gatorade still on him, he is the new Michigan coach...film at 11....

Saturday, December 8, 2007

What happens when Delusion becomes Reality??



Well looking thru my new Crimson Tinted Glasses, what I see is a team who, like many have said before, was divided on how to play for a coach like Saban after playing for a coach like Shula. Only 1 senior, Darren Mustin, plus 2 juniors were voted by the team to be "Permanent Captains" for this season, so it should tell you a little about the 20 plus Seniors who are leaving, and only 1 gets voted and 2 Juniors are voted over the remaining Seniors. Anytime a Junior beats a Senior in a leadership position is bad, but when 2 Juniors get it, thats terrible.

Now looking toward the future, I think when we get Julio Jones, we should be right there with Georgia in recruiting....Give Evil Richt credit, he has stocked Georgia for a MNC run for the next few years....If we can string 2 or 3 classes like this one, and at least reach the SEC Championship game in the next few years and compete, we should see a vast improvement on the field over last years team. I would at least hope the Seniors on this team will have enough pride to put forth 100% effort to win this bowl game, but I just dont see it. Only Wallace Gilberry and Darren Mustin will probaly give their all, maybe DJ Hall will finally have a game like he did vs Tenn...he needs it to move his stock up and maybe go to the Senior Bowl if he wants to go to the NFL....Next years buzzwords will be "Consistency and Finish" We were somewhat consistent til the LSU game, then we didnt finish anything....but know this...the teams that beat us, that shouldnt have beat us....ULM, MISS ST, Troy, UAB Intramural Flag Football,Little River Comm College, Hoover High School, you guys just made the list...the retribution will be painful and ugly, more along the lines of 48-0 in the first half.....we will hang "half a hundred" on all of these teams, and they will like it!!!

Moving forward to bowl season....Look, you have to win your Conference Championship to get into the BCS Championship...Period....Georgia fans can whine all they want, but put the shoe on the other foot....Had Georgia won the SEC Championship game, and LSU was in the same spot as Georgia is now, then had LSU jumped into the BCS game over Georgia, the city of Atlanta would have exploded.....Yeah, we know there isnt a rule about that, but there is common sense.....does Oklahoma ring a bell from 2003? That was BS, but it gave LSU and Saban a waltz to the Crystal Trophy.....

Another thing, if you are gonna have to win your Conference, why not keep it uniform throughout the NCAA D-1? The Big 10 is a joke, add 2 more teams and force them to have a Championship game so they can have a chance for tOSU to get their season screwed up like LSU screwed up Tenns. season a few years back...all Tenn had to do is get past LSU and boom, they were in the BCS...LSU put that dream to bed real quick....

There is a link that a few of my fellow "delusional"Alabama fans have posted on YouTube...I will link that here the next time I post....if you are for or against Alabama...you will find this link funny....sad, but I actually know fans that will be depicted in that video....

Tuesday, November 27, 2007

Well....thanks to ten years worth of bullshit...we are where we thought we were...6 in a row to Auburn! :(

What Tubberville will look like for keeping the Auburn job

"Well Sexton says if I win the 6th one, he can get the buyout waived...honestly, I hate it here, Nick...its not gonna be as fun since you showed up, and Sexton says since you got paid, nows the time for me to strike when the irons hot and with Walmart paying the tab, I may be able to match your paycheck...if your ever up that way and need to get a deal at Sams Club on a TV or some Tyson chicken, look me up..Good luck with Julio, I hear his mom wants to the Reggie Bush treatment. Well, just got a text from Jimmy, the dummys at Auburn fell for it, well gotta go get paid....if ya beat me 2 yrs in a row, I'll probaly get run outta town anyway....."
Well after probation, suspensions, Seniors and Shula recruits pretty much quitting, we are at the end of the rope and end of the season. Running off players who wont buy in must be the best job as a coach, cleaning house and getting his players in there and replacing the ones who are taking up space......Good riddance to the half assed and half hearted.


Saban knows what it takes and what kind of players it will take to compete on a serious level week in and week out, for the duration. We didnt have that luxury this year. Auburn was just deeper and more talented and just as boring as we were on offense. Thankfully we will have somewhat of a lil bit deeper defense and hopefully JPW will improve vastly and not end up as bad as Brandon Cox, a 5th yr senior who looks like he is fresh off the bus from a local high school. JPW play this year suggest he regressed, maybe he and whoever is calling the plays next year will have a lil more communication and help him get better. Maybe we can have a real offensive line that can gel and be more physical to take the pressure off him. Lord knows he


does not need pressure. He doesnt improvise well since 1/2 of his INTS either go the distance to score for the other team, or sets them up for an easy 2 yrd score at the apex of the game, and usually this is the knife that cuts the throat.....our own throat....


I can say this....give Saban 9 yrs, and he would have at least had 2 MNC and at least 3 SEC championships.......What does Tubs have to show for his tenure? Well 6 wins over instate rival is commendable.....I am sure just 1 SEC championship has got some money people in Auburn thinking about a change...maybe in another 9 yrs they can get another SEC championship...but looking at the level of competion and the landscape (GA/FLA) and with Nutt moving to Ole Miss, and the coaching being shaken up in the West, I am sure the coaching turnover will make it more competitive. With Saban stocking up and getting all the 4/5 star talent in Alabama, Tubs days are over as far as streaks go, I promise...Everytime Auburn has some "million dollar talent" and they are poised to make a run at the MNC, they trip themselves up. Doesnt matter, Tubs is going to Arkansas since Nutt bolted to Ole Miss.


Look, I am a realist....I knew when we got Saban it would change the face of the SEC, at least in our division....In a conservative estimate,by 2009/2010 with 2 or 3 good classes we should be able to win the West and at least compete for the title against either Georgia or Florida...They have some juggernauts there on the offensive side of the ball and I think Florida has the youngest and biggest talent, plus they have been to the big dance before and should be able to get there again..they just need to get a better defense ASAP to keep from getting blown out by Georgia again...by that time if they dont have a defense, I am sure they will just try to score 50 pts a game, and hopefully Tebow and Moreno and Harvin will go pro as JRs...
Roll Tide 10-2 in 2008

Monday, November 19, 2007

Croomed and Doomed.....Welcome to the Shula flashback channel





Well we lost to Miss. St...then we lose to ULM...I think this is what Coach Saban referred to as rock bottom....He has been trying to relay a message to his "new" team throughout the year, to the public, to his team and the media that this team has some sure enough half assed slackers....according to one of my friends that is a G.A .in the Athletic dept, after the game, Saban told everyone in the locker room toSIT DOWN AND SHUT THE FUCK UP! and no one said a word for 5 mins....
He finally paced around and let 'er rip with the following:(paraphrased)
"There are 10% of you that are glad to be here, you show up at practice, day in and day out, perform on a high level and contribute to the success of this team. I want to thank you for that.
There is another 10% of you that TRY to perform at a high level and thats all I can ask you for.
The other 80% have the talent and ability to perform at a high level, but choose not to...those 80% need to see if they are committed, and if not, fiqure out how to pay for their education next year, cause it wont be on this team." Well its a fact..there are players on this team who are counting the days and marking them off til the end of the season..... He was just letting them know that scholarships are renewable, and if they are taking up space, he will cut dead weight. What I saw in this game is like a power struggle, old players from the other regime that want to do things their way, and I am sure Saban used this game to prove a point...hey, you practice your way, play the game your way, and BoomMotherfucker, thats what you get.....he used the analogy of "hitting rock bottom" that usually gets the addicts attention before a change is made, and I am sure they found the bottom after this game, and hopefully we can cut the dead weight and move on. Cant wait to purge some of these losers that cant get over themselves. DJ was only suspended for only the half, since it was Senior Day and Saban wanted him to at least play 1/2 a game at his last game as a Senior in B-D Stadium, and he wasnt suspended for the whole game like it was wrongly reported....If they are a halfway decent team, they will respond since I know they are getting it put on their asses this week in practice. I hope so....... And at the press conference, he didnt compare losing a football game to 9/11 or Pearl Harbor, he simply showed them as times of disaster and how people came together to put the pieces back...and this game vs LM was as close as a disaster on the football field that you can get, he is simply pointing out this game after the fact will show what this team is made of in the way it responds to adversity...Basically telling the team---hey we did it your way this week, your the laughing stock of the nation, now we are gonna do it my way, How Does It Feel???? I am sure the feeling aint the best in the world. If I was a player, I would not show my face until I won the next game.
I hope they feel good since they embarrassed themselves beyond reason.....I hope they never forget this feeling of being a loser..maybe the underclassmen that come back next year will carry something from this and step up to be better leaders on this team since there seem to be no Senior leadership, which means Character and Heart, which Alabama has never had since Croyle and Prothro. and Demeco Ryans donned a Crimson jersey.

Friday, November 9, 2007

Alabama vs Mississippi St....Trap Game???


Well, this is the game that got Mike Shula fired and basically coined the phrase" Getting Croomed".
This year, they look a little better than they did last year, basically filling this years mold of SEC teams, winning games your not supposed to and getting blown out on the games you should win. Case in point, KY v MISS ST, Ky knocks off LSU, and KY gets Croomed. Yes , it happened in a big way. This game, like most, will be decided by 3rd down conversions and turnovers. Should be perfect weather in the 'Hood that is Starkville.
Don't ever make a wrong turn in Starkville. Trust me. I think we will be able to run the ball and should be able to stop them. They aint LSU by not stretch of the imagination, but we aint Kentuck, we can pass and run the ball pretty good, and Miss St does not have the weapons LSU had. If we can get everyone 1/2 healthy, we should win by 10, barring any boneheaded mistakes coming off such an emotional letdown. I hope we beat em down and remind them that they are Miss St and thats all they will be. Auburn turned the ball over 6 times and almost ended up winning it, so we dont need to spot them any points. LSU gave us 4 turnovers and we almost took advantage of it. We need to come out of this game healthy, put this one away early, and get ready for Auburn. I would love to hang 35 pts on Auburn and crush their souls....only after we hang 45 on MSU...I think if we jump on them early and often, they fall apart. Its a freshmen QB, fuckin hit him where he dont want to come back in the game....Destroy Destroy Destroy!!! Hopefully Georgia fuckin humiliates Auburn and physically beats them down to where we can mop them up in a few weeks!!! ROLL MFN TIDE!!

We came close, alas, no Gumbo......







All the hype lived up to its billing...Alabama kept coming back to lead the game and simple missed coverages, tackles and bad calls by the worst Refs in the SEC still couldn't keep Alabama out of the game. There for awhile, LSU tried to give the game to Alabama, but Alabama would find a way to screw it up. We were going down the field to get the lead back, JPW throws a pass that Caldwell dove and got, and the refs said incomplete? Bullshit! So now, the diving catch is obsolete? Fuck that. Then,cue the Rex Grossman side of JPW!!


Alabama got it back, but safety Chad Jones burst up the middle to sack John Parker Wilson and knock the ball away. Then the Bama nation yelled "GODDAMNSHITMUTHAFUCKINHOLDTHEGODDAMNBALLDUMBASSS!!! It rolled along the turf until LSU's Curtis Taylor fell on it at the Tide 4. Perfect timing for a QB meltdown, at the apex of the game we had scraped and clawed and overcame bad calls, to throw it all the way in this punk ass fashion, was fucking unbelievable.
Two plays later, Jacob Hester dove over from the 1 with 1:26 left and LSU was still in the title race.
And even after all that, we still had a chance if Keith Brown catches and hangs on, but he got rocked and that was that. I will say this, LSU has talent, but has no discipline, and if they dont get it together against a deeper team, it will cost them. Les Miles calling a screen pass from his own end zone, that we pick off, would have been a Pick 6 against the likes of OSU or Oregon or Kansas.. I guess its all a mute point since if we would have went to OT, they win anyway since no one even tried to block Dorsey. My voice was hoarse from yelling, my BP thru the roof, and in one fell swoop, my game buzz was gone when JPW dropped the ball. Goddammit, he look Clausenesque in his futile attempt to fuck the game away. Its a love-hate relationship with JPW and til he throws another TD, its full on hate mode. Especially if he does not show up for the Miss State game.... I'll cover that one next....

Friday, November 2, 2007

A Tale of Two Coaches-Alabama vs LSU




LIKE A SNAIL ON THE EDGE OF A RAZOR>>>>MY GAMEPLAN>>>>>>MY NIGHTMARE


"Uhhh Let 'er Rip....not my underwear!!"








TAFFFFFYY!!!





Well this week is finally here. This is our biggest game of the year so far, for many many reasons. For Nick Saban, this is the game he circled on his calendar once he got here after so many LSU fans were talking smack and basically were out of their minds with some weird form of jealousy.





LSU fans are like some crazy ex-girlfriend or ex-wife that won't let you live your life after everything is said and done. Just dont know how to let gooooooooo. Plus the fact that LSU players have recently decided to 'thug out' and get thrown off the team puts this game in a new light. IMHO, I am suprised we have won some of the games we have won, and I am sure if Shula was still here, we'd be in the same shape as last year. Thank God we got a really good proven Coach! If we keep it close, run right at the heart of their defense and keep their offense off the field, and lastly, have the ball last when we have the lead, we can win. Last time we were in a big game and I had this weird "paranormal" feeling-like dreams of us winning and winning big-was the 1992 Natl Championship....My dream this time involves their QB Flynn getting injured early and some unknown backup getting his lunch ate with crucial turnovers....I hope that happens.




Add Image


Les Miles is certifiably insane. In 3 games he should have lost, he came off looking like an evil genius, much like Col. Kurtz from Apocalypse Now....his gameplan is a snail crawling along the edge of a razor...thats his dream...thats his nightmare....He ask questions to his team like

"Do you know that IF is the middle word of LIFE?" He'll expand your mind, man....and go for it on 4th and ALL OF IT....and win......How? Fuckin Lucky, thats how! If he was behind on his bills and needed to win the lottery to get caught back up, he would have the winning numbers, some how some way...
And Nick Saban has been dispatched on a mission that does not exist...wipe out Les Miles and his men and burn Nick Sabans memory on the skulls of the unbelievers.....

Oh Les Miles has been very quiet...too quiet.....why? Probaly because of his players getting in trouble, having to kick Derrick"Aint no punk bitch"Odom off the team and deciding whether Perrilloux heads to T town or not. My prediction will be based on gut feelings-and I feel with all that has happened since we found our offense, if we are consistent, we should win by a score of




27-24. To get there we will need excellent QB play, our playmakers will have to MAKE PLAYS!! and we will need help from our special teams as in ARENAS getting big chunks of yardage to keep the field short. I think if we draw first blood, and draw last blood, we win. If the team that played Tenn. shows up and not the team that played Georgia, we will win.



Roll MFN TIDEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Saturday, October 20, 2007

Roll Tide Finally found an offense


Yo yaw yaw footbaw...... New and Improved.....but for how long???

First I would like to thank the Univerisity of Alabama for essentially torpedo-ing this football teams chance at success by deciding, in the middle of the season, to suspend 5 players for some mysterious charge of reselling books....for something that happened a few years ago, now is the time to punish not only them, but the whole team? Who says Admin doenst hold grudges??? If the effects arent felt now, they will be felt in the future...We are wafer thin on the O-line, now they have effectively steered the Titanic full steam ahead into the Iceberg, and there wont be anyone to patch it up or raise it after the damage is done....
Well, after we beat Houston in the last minute, we went to Oxford and beat "The Orgeron" in probaly his last game as an Head Coach for awhile...
Then Fulmer came to town and we pounded Tenn. back to the stone age with Field goals aplenty and a "new and improved" version of JPW. Finally started completing some passes and good things started to happen. Our offense is linear to how he performs week in and week out.....
Now thank God we can play 4 full quarters of complete football. The SEC is like living in a huge Catholic family full of boxers, who may have the best boxers in the Nation. Problem is, they beat each other up before they have to go play on a National level, and most times have had injuries due to the weekly beatings in the house, and cant play to full potential. Whoever makes it to the National stage after surviving weekly pummelings actually deserve to be there, and will destroy whomever is unlucky enought to face them at the end.
ROLL MF'N TIDE.


Saturday, September 15, 2007

Auburn Sucks, Tennesse still never stopped. Alabama has a good 2 min offense, can't stop Humanity Advanced, escapes with their lives, 3 players missin











The best Saturday in football and I am stuck at work. Auburn got Croomed at home making their home record 0-2. Tuberville will probaly fire everbody, then he will get fired.




Tim Tebow makes his statement for the Heisman trophy campaign with some kissing and passing while beating the crap out of Tennessee, just for fun. EDSBS gets a huge ass shout out from Vern Lunquist then gets interrupted by another Florida touchdown. Thats pretty freakin awesome. Great, witty and funny website that deserves a shoutout. Alabama is about to kick off and I hope we beat the crap out of the hogs and Humanity Advanced. The photo is of an prototypical Tenn/ Arkansas fan. You really cant tell the diffence except by the size of the Tenn. fans head. Arkansas fans forehead seem to protrude less, where Tenn. fans foreheads look likePeyton Mannings. Then Alabama has the game in a great start, things are looking good, we are up 31-17 in the 3rd quarter, I am thinking we will run the ball to grind out the clock, but nooooo, we have to let them blitz and JPW throws an INT. Then Humanity Advanced smells blood and simply takes over the game. The defense allowed him to smell fear, and he fed on it until they were up 38-31. Guys, they had no passing game, and basically had 2 running plays, one with McFadden and one without McFadden. On the upside, Alabama didnt cover the 4 pts and I won 300 bucks. It ended up a happy ending, but good God, I hate those signature wins like that. Then they showed Humanitys Advanced tricked out red Chevy Malibu that had to have at least $25,000 worth of bling. The car is probaly worth 3500 bucks real money. I am sure the NCAA is wondering how a poor tailback can afford a tricked out ride, and no one in his family has the W-2 to back it up. Last time I saw bling like that was when Fernado Bryant was rollin in a SL500 Mercedes in '97 as a JR. Then Alabama goes on probation...coincedence? I think not.


Gators Gone Wild























That was the best game I have ever seen,(after of course the Kick and Goal Line Stand )with talent at every position. Scary part is, Baby Rhino has at least 2 more yrs to get stronger- faster- smarter. Pretty soon they will basically communicate the offense via Telepathic Signals. I am not quite sure that this isnt a cult pretending to be a football team. They are the Scientologist of SEC football. Urban Meyer is a level 12 high monkety-monk with secret hand shakes and all that shit. Now they can simply make copies of their play book and send em out to all their competition and dare them to stop them. It will be fun to watch LSU play Florida. IT will be Baby Rhino's Telepathic Scientologist vs. Humanity Disassembled (Dorsey) and his Werewolves w/Chainsaw for Penis' Defense. I dont know if a platoon of Navy Seals with weapons could stop the offense.







This will be the Answer to the Riddle that is a Mystery wrapped in an Enigma--What happens when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object??? I personally think when the two teams actually collide, both will either evaporate from the release of energy and create a black hole that sucks the moon into the earth, or it will create a 4th dimension similar to Donnie Darko.